Twenty Years Ago

Hello Family, How was your weekend? My was pretty good. For the most part I am home body, but this weekend I attended a gala. It is always nice to see us at our best. While sitting at the pre-party reception, I found myself thinking back over my life. About twenty-five years ago I remember sitting in my apartment, on the floor, with no furniture (ex-husband took it, that’s another story) trying to figure out how I was going to make it. I had a toddler and an infant and I could not see my way out. I spent many days crying. I wanted so much more for my life. I anticipated so much more. I was a good student made good grades, played sports, hell offered an athletic scholarship, decided to accept an academic scholarship. Yet I was sitting on a floor in an apartment with two babies depending on me, no money, no insight and squandered opportunities, defeated, depressed and despondent. I had nothing and I did not know what to do. So I made the decision to get a job and go back to school. I did not know how any of this would be possible, but anything was better than my current station.

What I know for sure: Where you start does not have to be your ending. You get to decide. You can make the necessary adjustments to change your life whenever you truly want to make a change. I had no idea what I was going to do or how I was going to do it. But I did know this was not the life I envisioned when I was growing up. I also knew I deserved better, more and it was up to me to go after my “more.” My first decent paying job was driving a school bus. It was not what I envisioned but it was my start. I dropped out of college and my return began at a junior college. This was not what I planned for my future, but I had to start somewhere and this was my “redo.” I was the creator of my chaos and now it was time to start designing my destiny.

I know at times life can seem bleak but if you continue to take the next right step you will get to your desired destination. It is up to you. Stay where you are or move. You may not know how to get there but if you keep pressing on, you will arrive. Your trajectory is onward, upward and beyond. Trust the process, there is so much to your life. Make your moves deliberate and keep going.

Looking back on my life; I am not where I want to be. but life is better than it was….